webster on the web

A few random thoughts this morning….

As I was running yesterday afternoon, I was listening to Pandora on my phone and an advertisement came on for a product called “23 and Me.” This, believe it or not, is a do-it-yourself DNA test kit for home use.

At first I thought “Wow. Science has come really far.”  But then I didn’t quite know what to think.  The ad touted the product’s ability to offer reports on health history and “ancestry composition,” and hinted that you might discover something exciting. But I had my doubts.

Still, I was intrigued, so I checked out their website, which pretty much promised the same things.  But I already know where my family comes from and what kinds of diseases run in my family.  Any diseases I don’t already know about … well, I’m not sure I want to.

I was, however, amused by what they call their DNA-test-in-a-box: a “spit kit.”  And I also found it funny that they consider one of the kit’s biggest draws to be its ability to tell you your “Neanderthal percentage.”

Is that really a question that keeps people awake at night?

By the way, if you’re still looking for a Father’s Day gift, the website reminds us that “23 and Me” would make a great gift. It certainly would be easy to wrap; it’s a $99 popsicle stick in a box.

Random thought #2:

I also spent some time yesterday afternoon in a dentist’s chair, getting an annoying tooth taken care of.  My dentist (at my request) shot me up with enough Novocaine to stop a charging Rhino, which did wonders to deaden the drilling pain. But it also led me to some interesting discoveries:

It is impossible to whistle when you’re hopped-up on Novocaine.

Directional spitting? Don’t try it. Trust me.

It’s amazing how people can stand there and talk to you like nothing is the matter, despite the fact that you left your tongue and chin in the dentist office.

Have any of these turned up in your corner of Webster?

In two places along Hatch Road, someone has pasted checkerboard posters on utility boxes. There’s no identifying marks or political statement of any kind, just the posters.

As you can see from the photos, someone has tried their darndest to rip them off, with little success. They’re stuck on there good.

Has anyone seen them elsewhere? Does anyone have a clue to what they mean or who the artist is? Maybe it’s that skeleton-artist guy who was decorating the Phillips Road overpass, deciding to branch out a bit.

email me at missyblog@gmail.com

Remember that blog I posted a little more than a week go about how two lawn care companies were littering our neighborhood with their marketing literature?  You’ll recall that White Lawn Care Company (WLCC) and Green Lawn Care Company (GLCC) were vying for the title of “Most Prolific Neighborhood Litterer of the Spring.”  For the record, GLCC won the very tight race, with a total of 19 fliers scattered on lawns and gutters within a two-mile radius.  WLCC came in a very close second with 18.

Well, a few days ago my friend Kristen posted the following photo and caption on my Facebook page which I needed to share with you:

She wrote, “Apparently one landscaping company read your blog! They taped their flier in my mailbox!”

I found this quite funny. Whether BPM Landscaping decided to use duct tape because of my blog, or because they’re just a more responsible company, I’d be much more inclined to use their services this summer than those of GLCC or WLCC.

My regular readers might remember a blog I posted around this time last year about a certain driveway seal-coating company and its marketing literature.  Specifically, it was about how their marketing literature was strewn all over our neighborhood. In one two-day period last April, my husband Jack and I picked up almost 30 of the fliers along our regular two-mile walking route through the neighborhood. They had fluttered out of the newspaper boxes where they had been carelessly stuffed, extracted by the strong spring winds.

Since then, I have always considered this particular company to be King of the Litterers. I thought their neighborhood trashing  record would stand forever.

But on Friday, it was in real danger.

On Friday afternoon, Jack and I were on that very same two-mile walk when we noticed a glossy white flier at the side of the road. We thought at first our seal-coating friends had gotten an early start on their littering in defense of their title. But we were surprised to see it was an entirely new contender in the litter derby — a lawn care company.  A little farther down the road we found a second. Then a third. We began to think that maybe, just maybe, this company was going to mount a serious challenge for the title.

All of a sudden we became much more vigilant as we walked, carefully inspecting lawns and bushes.  At one point we split up along two conjoined side streets to cover more ground. Sure enough, by the time we met back up at the far end, we had both collected a handful of glossy white flyers.  But we also had collected a handful of glossy green fliers.

Yes, ANOTHER lawn care company had joined the contest.

Game on.

Things got serious. We started keeping score. White Lawn Care Company (WLCC) had the early lead by virtue of all the fliers from the early part of the walk. But Green Lawn Care Company (GLCC) quickly made up the deficit.  Before long the score was neck-and-neck.  There were several lead changes.  By the time we got home we had lost count, and we were honestly excited to see if WLCC had been able to pull it out in the end.

But it wasn’t to be.  The final tally was 18 WLCC fliers, 19 GLCC fliers.

So our heartiest congratulations to Green Lawn Care Company. Their total was far short of  Driveway Seal-Coating Company’s record-setting 29 fliers, but they CAN claim the title of “Most Prolific Neighborhood Litterer of the Spring” so far. Enjoy that winning feeling, GLCC, for it will be fleeting. Driveway Seal-Coating Company — King of the Litterers — should be rejoining the game in a week or two.

Stay tuned.

WHY do I keep doing this to myself?

Why do I wait until two days before Easter to go out and get what I need to celebrate the holiday?  Yesterday morning my husband and I went to Wegmans to stock up on stuff we needed for Easter dinner.  Jack would have preferred to go Thursday night, and said so then.  “It’s going to be a zoo” if we waited until Good Friday, he said. “Pfshaw,” I responded. “There’s no way it could be worse than when I go on Sunday afternoon.”

So, I was wrong. Fortunately, for much of the shopping trip we were able to split up, creating two smaller targets, therefore making it easier to get through the aisles without being rear-ended.  But even then it was a physical and emotional challenge to get through the entire store. Finally I came to a point where I just gave up. We had everything we needed for dinner; I could return on Monday for everything else. With any luck, by then Wegmans will have installed traffic lights and one-way aisles.

Having arrived home safely from Wegmans, I still had to go out to the Dollar Store and K-Mart to get goodies for my kids’ Easter baskets.  (Yes, I know my youngest child just turned 19. And only one of the three still lives at home. But don’t judge me. My kids still like to get Easter baskets and I’m pretty sure they all still believe in the Easter Bunny.)  The crowds weren’t so bad, but the selection was a bit picked over. I hope the kids don’t mind getting jars of gherkins in their baskets this year.

OK, so I’ve learned my lesson. I’ll get an early start on Christmas this year, I promise. Good thing the Christmas decorations will be hitting the stores next week.

Oh boy, I’m in trouble now.

A friend of mine invited me to a Facebook “event” yesterday, which she calls “Spring Spotting.”  She described it thusly:

Every day for the next 15 post a picture of signs of spring, things that remind you of spring, etc. Let’s see if we can encourage Mother Nature to bring it on faster! We start Monday, March 25 and end Monday, April 8.

So I’m always up for a challenge, and I “joined.”  But now I kinda wish I hadn’t.  I mean, it’s a great idea, but I go to work every morning at 7 am and when I get home I pretty much hunker down for the evening.  I’m not exactly sure what kinds of spring-y things I’m going to see during my wildly over-scheduled day.

Maybe a sunrise. But everyone will do that. The perennials poking up through the garden? Everyone will do that. Deer tracks in the snow? Naw.

Wait. I got it.  Nothing says “Rochester spring” better than black slush piles. Potholes. Litter peeking out of the melting snowbanks like budding flowers.

OK, I got the first three days in the bag. Now don’t tell anyone else my ideas, OK?

It continues to amaze me how capricious blog ideas can be. There are times that I have so many story ideas in the pipeline that I have to draw up a schedule for them so I don’t forget any — and then another one or two come in that need immediate attention and throw my whole schedule off.

Then there’s times like now, when I got nuthin’.  That’s when I go trolling around the Internet to see if an idea jumps out at me. It didn’t take too long this time around.

My first trolling stop was the Webster section of the Democrat & Chronicle website, where I came across Stacy Gittleman’s final column. Stacy is just finishing up a three-year stint as the Our Towns East Extra columnist for the D&C.  She’s preparing to move with her family to Detroit, and as a result has to give up the column, and pass it on to the next lucky writer.

If you haven’t heard yet, that’s me.

Beginning this coming Friday, I’ll be writing the Our Towns east-side column, which will appear every Friday. But fear not; I’ll still be your Webster blogger, too. (I’m having too much fun with this to stop now.)

Stacy gave me a nice little intro in her final column, which I really appreciate (read the column here). But I particularly liked the part where she thanks the D&C for

…helping me find my voice in reporting on all the local heroes in our midst. It gave me such a sense of connection and belonging in Rochester to know that this column helped raise funds and awareness for so many of the causes that you support.

That pretty much sums up what I’ve always tried to do with my blog and what I’ll continue to try to do with the column.

In honor of my Webster roots, my first column will highlight Zech Vanzo, a Webster Thomas High School junior who’s making a name for himself in the music business.  You can get a preview of Zech’s story on my East Extra Facebook Page. I’m hoping to use the Facebook page to post bonus material including longer versions of the column, accompanying photos and calendar items that I couldn’t get into the column. There’s not much on there yet, but please consider popping over there and checking it out. (You could be my second “Like”!)

See you in the papers!

Every once in a while, something comes across my Facebook page that tickles my funny bone so much that I need to share it with everyone. That’s especially true if that something has to do with my favorite pastime, writing.

More and more these days, Facebook, instant messaging and texting have replaced face-to-face — or even phone-to-phone —  conversations. As a result, people don’t have the benefit of facial and vocal expression to help convey nuances in meaning.  It’s difficult, for example, to express sarcasm with the written word.

Mike Trapp, at Collegehumor.com has come up with a very workable solution, which I think you will enjoy.  He has proposed the following series of new punctuation marks:

8 New Punctuation Marks We Desperately Need