Bygone blog: OMG! IDK WTH these stickers mean!

10 Aug

This is the fourth in my series of Bygone Blogs, in which I am re-posting some of my favorite blogs from the last 8 years. This one was originally published on February 4, 2013. 

242013 sticker

Have you noticed the recent proliferation of those oval bumper stickers with the initials on them?

I’m sure you’ve seen them. They’re usually white with thick black borders and say things like “ADK,” “SLX,” “QKA” or “BHV.” Most of the time you’ll see just one stuck to a bumper or window, but sometimes they travel in packs. Like yesterday, as I was driving down Ridge Road, I was following a car that had stickers that said SOBX, WEB, NC, EI, SLX and LAX. (He must have been a collector.)

They’re all very confusing. I mean, with your regular rectangular bumper sticker, there’s no doubt where you stand. You’re proud of your honor student. You’ve conquered some mountain. You heart your shih tzu. But I can only guess what “SOBX” means. So what’s the purpose of putting a sticker on your car when YOU’RE the only one who knows what it means?

But these folks are obviously proud of SOMETHING, so I do my best to try to figure them out. Mr. Collector, I have decided, is a very unhappily divorced computer programmer who lives in North Carolina, sells employment insurance and trousers on the side, and has recently flown to Los Angeles.

Now I have to admit that I, too, have one of these oval stickers on my car. It reads “WOF,” and fewer than fifty people in the world know its significance. And I’m OK with that, because it’s important to me and that’s all that matters. So I guess I can’t judge anyone else who has a fixation with these cryptic message stickers.

But I won’t be joining the Association for Silly Stickers anytime soon. And if I do, I will certainly NOT put their oval sticker on my car.

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