Bygone blog — my diaper bag theory of motherhood

7 Aug

This is the latest in my on-again, off-again series of Bygone Blogs, in which I am re-posting some of my favorite blogs from the last 14 years.

I was reminded of this particular blog when I happened across a new mother at a park recently. It was originally published on March 29, 2009.

Diaper bag theory of motherhood

Have you ever noticed how you can tell how many babies a mother has had by the size of her diaper bag?
Here’s my theory:

First baby:

Diaper bag rivals the suitcase you would pack for a week’s trip to Europe. It contains:

  • changing pad
  • at least a half dozen diapers
  • baby wipes
  • baby oil
  • baby powder
  • four extra Binkies (in case the one currently in use falls to the ground, a second in case the first backup falls to the ground, and two more … just in case)
  • two bottles of formula
  • three burp cloths
  • two changes of clothes
  • at least three rattles or other kind of highly educational and stimulating toys
  • blanket
  • band-aids
  • Neosporin
  • Children’s Tylenol

(And if you’re planning to be out for more than an hour, double everything.)

Second baby:

Diaper bag is about the size of an insulated lunch box. Inside is stuffed:

  • a couple of diapers
  • diaper wipes
  • burp cloth
  • spare Onesie
  • one extra Binkie (if you remember)
  • a bottle of formula or water
  • rattle

Third baby:

No bag necesary. You stuff a diaper into your back pocket and you’re all set.

* * *

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(posted 8/7/2022)

7 Responses to “Bygone blog — my diaper bag theory of motherhood”

  1. Mary Heveron-Smith August 7, 2022 at 10:17 pm #

    LOL. I’m not ‘fessing up to anything!

  2. Nancy Syracusa August 8, 2022 at 8:12 am #

    The truth is always funny when it’s past!

  3. Deborah Silver August 8, 2022 at 1:16 pm #

    That gave me a good belly laugh. Thank you!


  4. 'oh, him ...' August 17, 2022 at 2:12 pm #

    The same observation may be applied to baby pictures. When Mom passed there were 17 photo albums* of Oldest child, 8 albums of the of Middle child. Youngest child: one framed baby pic … with paint speckles on the frame.
    Mom & Dad must have been painting the basement. “Oh, we forgot to move [blanks] baby photo and now it’s got paint flecks on the frame.” “Oh well; he’ll understand …”
    [* We calculated an average of approximately 1 roll of 24 exposure film every three months from birth to OC’s college graduation.]

    • websterontheweb August 17, 2022 at 2:27 pm #

      So true! I have heard the same complaint from my three kids as well. Or at least my youngest anyway! 🙂 Thanks so much for writing!

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